
And the hovering helicopters that churn dust like You turn the wheel of time.
Now that I am surrounded by silence,
And come out with friends, images of sadness reflected in my eyes.
Now that I see the beauty that You created,
Nature so sublime amidst desperation, knocking at my soul like a falling petal.
Oh God! Please allow me to cry,
As I suffocate from grief.
All I can offer is a broken jar that does not dare leak.
My shattered heart that screams the desolation of what I am leaving behind.
My soul bares the marks of war.
Yet I come out, not in triumph, but in sadness - humbled by it all.
I learned that the world is dark, yet immensely harmonious,
And that the desperation of mothers will not change the glory of it all.
I learned that we are but simple specks,
Yet we can light up the nights of war like fire flies on a summer’s night.
I also learned that as the wind moves the clouds, the wounded weep;
But that unlike melting snow, the missing are not forgotten.
Omniscient, You observe this world held together but by unmarked graves,
Where suffering never walks alone and smiles linger on.
Like a stone thrown into a vast lake, my prayers dissipate.
Only You can hear my thanks and my angst.
I was born with a knife in my heart destined to bleed for the hurt of others.
From this clear view, I can see the majestic in the most humble.
Wars are waged and people die. So simply, so powerfully so.
I am privileged to see it thus.
In solitude now, I think of what I am leaving and how it could be.
Silence You impose. Yet, You speak through glory.
You make Your presence known, through the tattered clothes and the rings formed in water,
And the yellow flowers I saw blooming in the desert impervious to it all.
As ephemeral as I am,
My heart is truthful as I come to pray.
Consider please, that I have fought against desperation and rage,
Yet scored only insignificant victories.
Consider also, that I have tried to leave anger aside, and remain as patient as can be,
But that my only success was to silence my sadness.
Yes, I have laughed and smiled. I have comforted also.
But I have not cried.
Oh God! Please let me cry
So that I may shed the sorrow that my heart contains.
Oh God! Please let me cry
So that my tears may heal the land between rivers.
- Kenza
Iraq, May 2006